-Question submitted by Anonymous

—

Dannielle Says: 

Good ass question. 

I think it’ll prolly be a slow process. Start by not saying the bitchy things you think, instead text them to your also-bitchy bff. I think the more you have them in writing (texting) the more you’ll notice exactly what it is you’re thinking and when. Also, talking yourself down helps. If in your head you’re like ‘ugh this place sucks and everyone here is dressed stupid and the music is so gayyyyyyyyy’ take a minute and say ‘alllright, they’re not stupid bc they’re not dressed like me, music can’t really be gay and this place could be alright i guess’ … Taking those few steps back to not think everything is the TOTAL worst can help too. 

AND ALSO. Remember that we’re all people and the world would be a much better place if we were just nice to one another. AND ON TOP OF THAT remember how easy it is to be nice. Take four seconds out of your day to hold a door for someone you don’t know. Let some guy cut in front of you at Hardee’s. Pick up someone’s book. Smile at a stranger. Thank the bus driver. Leave a penny at the stupid leave a penny thing. Do tiny things that are the opposite of bitchy and do them on purpose. Live your life with purpose, yall, and just be nice. That’s how we can fix the whole earth. 

Kristin Says:

Here are the reasons I am a bitch, and what I do to try and not be one:

1. Anger: When I get angry about something, I am then a bitch with a much larger bitch-radius then just that item that originally angered me. Por ejemplo, if I am on the phone with someone trying to figure out my bank charges and they are RUDE and INCOMPETENT, I will then get off the phone and be a total bitch to anyone in my path because I AM SO ANGRY BECAUSE I KNOW THINGS AND THE BANK LADY WAS MEAN TO ME AND I AM A GOOD PERSON GODDAMMIT. So. In that instance, I think it is taking a moment to realize what is making you angry, reassuring yourself that the bank lady is probably just having a really bad day and didn’t mean to be so horrible, taking a deep breath and realizing that you have the power to stop the anger in its tracks by moving forward and being kind.

2. Confusion: If I don’t understand something, I can get reaallllll bitchy. Dannielle is actually the queen of this method of bitchdom, she will be all, “ADOBE PHOTOSHOP IS THE STUPIDEST PROGRAM EVER, IT DOESN’T WORK AND I HATE IT.” Then she will learn a shortcut and be like, “Ohhhhh, anyway, you lookin’ real fine Adobe Photoshop.” In this arena of bitchiness, you have to remember that you are a person, and you can’t know everything at the speed of light. You can ask questions, you can take the time you need to understand things better… and none of that will make you seem dumb. It will actually make you seem strong and smart (which you are.)

3. Feeling stupid: This is the CREME DE LA CREME of reasons people are bitchwads, including moi. If you feel like your friends have an inside joke, or if you feel like someone is laughing at you, or if you feel like people might think your new haircut isn’t awesome, or if you think that other people think you aren’t smart… your defense is usually to put up a wall of defense and be like I DON’T EVEN CARE WHAT YOU THINK, AS A MATTER OF FACT I CARE SO LITTLE THAT I WILL GO OUT OF MY TO SHOW YOU THAT YOU DON’T MATTER TO ME. Here’s the thing. We all feel like this sometimes. Chances are that most of the time, no one thinks you are stupid, and what’s more: if certain people are thinking those negative things, it doesn’t have any power to make you stupid. If anything, it makes them appear weak and childish. So, remember that by leaving it alone, you are taking away their power. When that feeling of bitchpower surges through your veins, take a deep breath and remember that your strength is in believing in yourself and focusing on the positive things that surround you.