-Question submitted by Anonymous

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Dannielle Says: 

I would literally tell them to stop bitching about each other to you. Because here’s the thing… they hate each other, whatever. That already makes me wary, for what reason? Doesn’t it make you feel weird that they’re both soooo against the other they can’t even be civil human beings?? Like… WHAT’S GOING ON, WHO IS ACTUALLY THAT MAD? 

Anyway, they can hate each other and roll their eyes when the other makes a joke or whatever WITHOUT involving you directly. The next time PAPERTOWELS (your girlfriend) starts to talk smack about PONYTAILS (your roomie) stop her and say ‘hey papertowels, i love you and i want you to be able to talk to me about stuff, but i really don’t wanna talk about ponytails. I just feel like nothing will really come of it, and she’s one of my good friends, so like, i’m not gonna say anything bad about her you know?”

This will prolly cause a tiny fight, but when it comes down to it, you’re not asking her to love your roomie, you’re just asking her to bitch a little less. AND DO THE SAME WITH YOUR ROOME ‘hey ponytails, i love papertowels and i’m not gonna talk shit about her..sooo’ you know what i mean? EASY PEASY. Do what you gotta do to keep your emotional well-being stable.. you are SUPER important.

Kristin Says:

This is ridiculous and it pisses me STRAIGHT OFF. I am now in a fight with both PAPERTOWELS and PONYTAILS and I would like to tell you, Anonymous, that I am mad at them and I think they are acting immature and stupid. So, now you have to deal with a new problem: PAPERTOWELS, PONYTAILS, AND KRISTIN all bitch to you about each other.

Seriously, though, the first thing that you should know is that this is a completely unfair situation that you are in - so feel justified for being angry and uncomfortable, because that is exactly  how I would feel as well.

I would tackle this with your roommate first, because I think that this is a space that you both share… so the responsibility is more on her to make it a comfortable living environment for you and the people who mean a lot to you (read: PAPERTOWELS). The next time she bitches, just ask her if there is anything that would make her experience in the apartment a bit more bearable, because you love PAPERTOWELS and she is going to be around, but if there is anything that can be done so that PONYTAILS is more comfortable, you are all ears.

Then, say very nicely, “It would mean a lot if we could get to a place where you are less upset with PAPERTOWELS, only because I live here and I care about her, and I just want all of us to be as content as possible.”

THEN, talk to your boo #papertowels and explain that you’ve been feeling really torn about the house conflict, and that you talked to your roommate #ponytails so that things would get a little easier. Tell her you care about her and love her and that if there is anything that could be better for her, you are ALL EARS, but that July is the month of peacemaking and you want to all work together toward INDEPENDENCE FROM YOUR CONFLICTS.

Eh? #IndependenceDayResolutions