“My best friend is best friends with someone else. Although we are very close, the two are literally inseparable and I constantly feel put aside and inferior. How do I deal?”

-Question submitted by Anonymous

Dannielle Says:

Welp, it looks like we have two options. You either talk to her, or you don’t.

HERE ARE THE BENEFITS OF TALKING TO HER: She might not realize she’s leaving you out. Maybe there was one time where you were like ‘nah i gotta study’ and she took that as you have to study all the times. MAYBE she gets distracted and other friend is just around and other friend is like ‘LETS GET SUBWAY’ and your friend is like ‘word’ and it just happens. MAYBE she’s feeling weird about something and doesn’t know how to talk to you about it.

HERE ARE THE BENEFITS OF NOT TALKING TO HER: none.

See what I mean? You should talk to your friend. And you know what. If you do talk to your friend and she’s like ‘uhhh you’re being weird calm down’ and she doesn’t take you seriously. Remember that you don’t deserve that, you deserve a bff who will hear you, listen to you, understand you and compromise with you. BFFs are just like LOVERs, you have to work together to keep your relationship strong.

Kristin Says:

AMEN SISTER.

First of all: I totally, completely feel you. I have been in that position before, and let me tell you - jealousy does not only apply to population boneville, it also applies to best friends and coworkers and sometimes pets and probably cheeseburgers and mayonnaise.

I get jealous a lot.

Moving on, yes you should absolutely talk to her. I think most of the doubt and hesitation in these situations (and probably ALL situations) comes from us thinking that the way we feel isn’t valid, and that when we give a voice to those feelings, the response will be one that makes us feel even worse than we do now. So, let me reiterate: feelings of jealousy, even when they aren’t completely logical, are still VALID FUCKING FEELINGS, you guys.

It is all about the way in which we approach the issue. Don’t make your BFF feel like she has done something wrong. Don’t get angry with her before you give her the chance to work with you and understand where you are coming from. Don’t make her feel weird for being so close with someone else. Say to her, simply, that you love spending time with her, and that sometimes you feel a little out of place because of how close she is with HERMOINE #herotherfriend. Listen to what she says and try not to get immediately defensive. Make a plan to hang out just the two of you, and also make a plan to hang out all THREE of you (#ron #harry #hermoine).

So long as you can have open communication, you can totally fix this. You are awesome, your BFF loves you for YOU, and no one else can replace that. Talk to her, remember that you are the fucking best, and always share your mayonnaise.

Filed under advice gay kitchen lgbtq megan fox pretty ladies best friend subway amen jealousy mayo condiments

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